Sunday, June 30, 2013

So. Much. To. Write. For. My. Three. Readers.

I'M ALIVE!

somewhat

That's it! Got my sexy vocaloid babes singing like angels (is that a butterfly on my right shoulder? idk) so LET'S DO THIS.

 thank you baby jesus, for these vocaloid gifts you have left us in your manger

Well, firstly, I apologize for being gone a million years (lol) again. I know I said I wouldn't, and I promised you, my three readers, that I would be more frequent; well, I'm sorry--I have family and projects and things and stuff and I just can't quit them. 

i have to have time for them, otherwise i go to jail and stuff. 
loljkiactuallydolovethemearnestly

Lots of crap has been taking place in my life (as usual) and things have been well for the most part. I've taken up sketching again, and have decided on a comic book style focus for the time being (pictures when I finish the crappy little offerings). Gaming has still been on the back burner unfortunately; just. too. much. to. do. 

Dieting has suffered severe nausea causing massive dizziness, which in turn caused it to fall off the wagon and tumble into the dirt. On the way down, its cutely patterned lolita stocking got caught on a wooden splinter, causing Dieting to be dragged behind the wagon lifelessly for several miles. Luckily, today the wagon has stopped for gas (horse feed?) and Dieting has climbed back on, bloody, ragged, and cursing at me for not providing Dramamine before this trip. 

essentially what i'll be doing from now til forever

So, today I have a bit of a review of a local comic book shop that I just tried out for the first time today. While I realize that some of you who read this blog are NOT located in Miami or anywhere near it, I figured a review would be helpful for readers who do live in Miami, or should any of you ever want to visit and absolutely need a papery cinematic thrill ride. I didn't take pictures this time around as my kids were being hellions, however, I will try and procure some.

Today's trek into comic land was via the diamond-in-the-rough vessel that is Korka's Comics in Pembroke Pines. At first, I was highly put off by the appearance of the shopping center it's housed in; think dingy, lacking a good coat of paint, cheap, no-name center and you've got the right idea. Korka's didn't even have a sign above the store--it's nestled into the only corner in the shopping center, leaving the consumer to have to search out the store before parking. Upon entering into the store, I was immediately struck by just how awful the decorative scheme was inside. 
Now, while I realize that decoration is hardly a deciding factor for most people looking for their favorite comics, ambiance is a massive deal to me considering that I will nine times out of ten buy something when I linger in a store long enough. Korka's makes one want to run and hide, or in my case, run home and curl up in bed with Sherlock on loop. 

your aesthetic grace makes my ladybits very happy, Mr. Cumberbatch

Initially, Korka's gives off a miserable "80's garage sale from hell" vibe--and no, not in the good way with Jem dolls and Rainbow Brite lunchboxes; in the awful faded out irrelevant toys, weird mannequins dressed in awkward collectible garb (like their dirty animatronic Hannibal Lecter for sale right next to the door), and an inordinate amount of The Simpsons collectibles in banged up, dusty and dirty boxes kind of way. The walls are painted off white with perceptible yellow staining, the ceiling has humidity stains accenting horrible fluorescent lighting; nothing is organized, and there was one area of the store named 'Pete's Corner' where an assortment of varied crap (because honestly, there is no better word for it) was lumped together haphazardly in a very pointless "just because" fashion. The gaming area was absolutely tiny with only four small tables available for play; however, being that this is predominantly a comic book store I don't factor that in to be a deciding point in my overall opinion of the place. The floors were dirty, their statuary was mediocre at best, and literally I felt like they were throwing in anything (like, literally, the items felt like things the owner had laying around his mother's attic) that was borderline geek-kitsch in the hopes some loser would walk in and want to buy it. 

 it is. it really is.

 Now, all that being said, would I go again?

Absolutely.

shocker town, population: you

The thing about Korka's is that where they lack almost any positive points in the overall feel of the store, they make it up immensely in customer service and comic variety/selection. I was asked if I needed help no less than three times while being there--and not in the awful "Need some help, little lady?" type way that I've gotten in other, much bigger places (cough *Tate's* cough--review for this niche giant coming soon). Employees were attentive, knowledgeable, and even funny, oddly enough. Their collection of comics (particularly back issues) was fantastic for a little hole in the wall shop, and they had everything I was looking for in current issues as well as some interesting older finds (today I walked out with the new Supes, Birds of Prey #1 (which, while not rare, I had been wanting for a while), and Sinestro Corps #1). I do have one issue here (no pun intended)--their organizational system of non-huge/popular titles is massively lacking. Anything independent is tossed into one massive box labeled "Indy Comics" which can be a major time dump for someone in a hurry or just not very patient. Also, the issues were massively dusty--my hands were nearly black after going through four longboxes. No manga is to be found at Korka's either (at least I didn't find any) but when I asked about Sailor Moon I was informed that they did get some random things in now and then (although one of the employees had no idea about the new SM manga release... I won't get into that) which was a plus. 

All in all, I give Korka's a 2 out of 5 stars? Cats? Ice cream cones? Idk. Either way, they earn those units of subjective judgmental worth and it's enough to keep me coming back (if not frequently).

Also, I read Saga #1 today!

It was like this:



I'll possibly write a review on the first issue, but I'm going to try and finagle the fiance into buying the next parts. 









Wednesday, June 12, 2013

I'll just leave this here...


Damn, son. Sony's got jokes. 

And they're hilarious. 

Microsoft, I love you, BUT GET WITH IT.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

The Problem with Microsoft and the Xbox One

Ugh, I am so beyond tired of Microsoft misrepresenting themselves. What happened to the sleek, future gamer ideal that was doing so well for them? I remember the Xbox debut fondly, thinking WOW, now this is a console. 

yeah, i remember you, you clunky motherfucker
istilloveyou

I was never too keen on Sony, and to be honest, I can't remember why I established that opinion in the first place. I remember thinking that they seemed more money hungry than anything--but looking at the practices that Microsoft has adopted as of late, I feel like it is harder than ever to be an Xbox fangirl (or Xbro, which I think is really cute for whatever reason). There are some fundamental issues with Microsoft's handling of the Xbox system as it is currently, and it's downright flabbergasting that they don't seem to pick up on these crucial flaws that are straight up detrimental to their cause and completely fueling Sonyboys. 

exactly.

In order to set your shit straight Microsoft, you need to: 
  1. Stop charging for every little thing people want to do online. Get rid of the paid aspect of Xbox Live. Sony has an immense lead on you for offering free online connectivity; hell, people can't even watch NETFLIX on your console without having an Xbox Live Gold account regardless of their having an existing Netflix account. Sony straight beats you into the ground there considering that now I have to pay for two subscriptions to enjoy tv show/movie streaming at my console. 
  2. Stop with the cheesy family oriented advertising. This is gaming you're trying to promote, as this is a gaming console first and foremost. A perfect example would be how Razer keeps their look sleek, edgy, and tailored for the pro gamer. While I realize that Xbox is for more than just the hardcore enthusiast, that should be your main focus and your other aims should be addressed sparingly. After all, it's not like you have THAT many family oriented titles, and they're nowhere near your main money makers. Family people go to Nintendo, and everyone knows that.
  3. You need to make your presentations feel younger. Get these tired looking forty somethings off the damn stage and hire presenters that are energetic, fun, and in tune with the gamer subculture. Watching your presentations is literally like watching those old "I'm a PC, I'm a Mac!" commercials. Not to mention, can they PLEASE get their damn hands out of their pockets and have open body language? Nothing says "I have no idea what I'm doing," like a presenter having one leading hand waving around maniacally and the other bashfully stowed away with accompanying forced excitement spewing out of their mouths. 
  4. Pay. Attention. To. Your. Consumer. Base. DAMMIT. It's not like you can't scope out what people are saying. Literally, go to IGN, Kotaku, GameSpot, a-n-y-w-h-e-r-e and witness what people are saying. Consumers are afraid of the used game dilemma and always online requirements? Well, ANSWER their questions. Don't be so damned dodgy, it only fuels resentment. Be straightforward and confident in your decisions and people will hop onto the acceptance train. I thought this was common business knowledge?
  5. Refresh your business. Hire younger people to run your social media and graphic design. Your look is old and tired, and people notice. 
  6. Last but most likely most important: stop your draconian business practices man! What the hell is going on with your lack of used games and your always online connectivity? Not to mention, DO NOT TELL THOSE OF US WHO DO NOT HAVE CONSISTENT INTERNET ACCESS TO STICK TO THE XBOX 360. WTF MICROSOFT?! Do you WANT to alienate your fanbase?!
Phew. 

seriously.

While people may not agree with me on some points, I think if those six elements were changed Microsoft would see a major difference and get some hate off their back. After all, we really don't need anymore pro-Sony memes and gifs. 

wholesome. 

MAJOR EDIT: I really, really liked Microsoft's E3 conference. Again, great console, shitty practices. 
Video at the end -->

ANOTHER EDIT: Microsoft just announced that they have revoked their always online (or rather, every 24 hour online check) and used game policies. Things resume as normal.

See guys? I have some massive pull. 

no not really. 

:(









Monday, June 10, 2013

Hey guys, I'm still here.

Firstly, deep apologies for totally neglecting the readership on this blog (to those three people that read this, I love you--sincerely)! Things have been downright crazy on my end, and between trying to leverage my position in my gaming clan (just became a practice captain, woo!), my new writing gig (just became an editor, woo!) and the immense changes taking place in my day to day life I am pretty much clammed up in the spewing-my-heart-out-onto-the-web front. 

pretty much

Argh! I was just going to write more and I totally got sidetracked on Slate reading about the new Boy Meets World spin-off. It better be good, because I will be beyond disappointed if it isn't. 

But, I digress. 

In my personal life, I have made a massive change to the modus operandi around here; i.e. I am no longer letting myself be fat. My fiance and I have been juice fasting--if that phrase means nothing to you, then you my friend, are a lucky person. If you do know what that means, then yes, I do in fact hate my life. Juice fasting is where one replaces the meals they would so gloriously be enjoying with pure fruit and vegetable juice instead. By drinking said juices on a regular time frame (around every three hours for us, for a total of six juices a day) one manages to detox the system, drop insane amounts of weight quickly, and clear up any straggling medical conditions they may have had. I've dropped 25 lbs in three weeks doing this, and my husband has dropped 35. Our inspiration was the documentary Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead, a pretty entertaining watch where a similarly fat, sick and nearly dead man named Joe Cross loses a ridiculous amount of weight on a 60 day juice fast and is super happy and totally not overbearing about it. 

look it up if you're fat.


also this helps

Aside from that, I did pick up an intern gig at this internet publication (which I won't mention because I'm not too keen on repping it yet) which is pretty damn sweet. Basically they take news and repost it (which is almost all news publications unless they're sitting there watching it happen, no?) and I (as an editor) take people's said news and make sure it doesn't sound like shit. It's a decent thing, except for the fact that I don't get paid and it's terribly time consuming and a total gamble. But, here's to hoping there's success in that venture. 

gg me, devoting an inordinate amount of time to free labor for someone else.

Things in the clan aren't looking so hot. Due to personal issues, I've had to take a leave of absence from the girls and focus on my ungodly lack of time to accomplish anything. 

In gaming news, did any of you watch the Starcraft World Championship Series?! I know I did! I was tweeting like a madwoman cheering on my main man INnoVation as he tore through his competition. That second day flawless victory against aLive was awesome to watch, as was his crushing win against sOs for the Season 1 title. That second match for the win was insane, and my Twitter was annoying as fuck, I'm sure, but idgaf, it was gloriously brilliant. Put it this way, it was so brilliant that I now look at my consoles with disdain and remember why I was ALWAYS a PC gamer. If you missed the finals, here are the last four games of the Season 1 championship.