Thursday, May 1, 2014

I'm back, and empty handed. Also anime and games and manga, oh my.

Okay, so I'm kind of freaking out that it's been so long since I've last posted anything that I literally had to look through my blog and see what FORMAT I used to use on here for posting. It's ridiculous that I have been MIA like this (again) but I'm doing my best to remedy that. I just haven't wanted to post since I wanted there to be so much more to say.


So, first things first: what the hell is going on with the store?

Absolutely nothing. 

i know michelle, i'm bummed too.

You see, the first time we applied for funding, we were promised a certain amount. Things were looking good, and we were stoked. Then, it turned out we only got around 45% of what we originally planned for. And... That sucked. 

So, we tried again. We jumped all of the same hurdles that we had to jump the first time, including repairing credit, building it, and submitting papers and spending money. Literally, we wrung every last dime we had into the process--yet we're still facing 60 days of wait time currently, and the process hasn't even started. And this time, we were only promised half of the original amount... So now I'm wondering if we'll only receive 20% of that this time. And of course, time has kept moving forward, and we DO have living expenses that pile up--so the original funding we received has slowly been dwindling the longer the process takes, leaving us with significantly less money than what we originally designed our store to be launched on.

Needless to say, the process has been arduous, emotionally draining, and a giant wave of disappointment. However, we're not giving up.

SHIT, WRONG GIF 

I still have one more option available to me, which I am employing right now. While it's not the very best option, it's one that I feel could bring in at least a glimmer of hope to this wretched situation. We'll still open, but it will be a significantly toned down version from our original plan. Hopefully people will still like us. 

probably not

...

Oh, and as if things aren't deliciously awful enough: 

-My husband was laid off (so there went a large chunk of our income)

  -One thousand five hundred dollars of my money has been tied up in a chargeback issue with my bank, the same bank that is now stating that I might not be able to get my funds back (despite being charged twice) because the merchant is holding the funds--to which the merchant responded that the bank is holding my funds

-I've gained like 15 lbs of stress weight (yum, so sexy... NOT)


i do. i really do.

Fun times.

BUT!

On the non-heartbreaking and utterly serious front, I have been drowning my sorrows in video games,  forums, manga and anime (since working on my novel when I'm like this is out of the question)

My highlights thus far:

Gaming:
Pokemon X and the 3DSXL (omg)
Ni No Kuni

Anime: 
KILL LA KILL

JUMP ABOARD THE KLK FUN JEEP

You know what? Let's just stop right there and take a moment to talk about what a glorious series this is. 


Now, I love anime--I can give almost anything a shot, and tend to stay open minded about what I'm watching. However, there are times that certain anime cliches get old, like the whole 'overuse-of-monologue' thing (can you say Deathnote, anyone?) or the ridiculous fanservice in some (not that I mind, but Free! or Sakura Trick are def. some of those). When it comes down to Kill La Kill though, I can honestly say that this is an anime that looks at itself honestly and KNOWS that this is what makes anime, well, anime. 

Kill La Kill takes these concepts and uses them to its advantage, spinning both drama and insane action with self-aware humor and major girl power--because that's another thing: this series is RUN BY GIRLS. 

Every single major character is female, their disputes are with females, and the only male characters in the show are supporting characters that rally behind female protagonists at all times. It was definitely refreshing to see such an action packed anime (because let me tell you, KLK plays out like a final episode EVERY SINGLE EPISODE) fleshed out this way since it's usually men that fill these character roles. 

Granted, KLK isn't as feminist as it would seem, as the show has gratuitous fanservice (but again, I don't mind in the slightest) and I would even say that it's NSFW. Here's Ryuko's (the main protagonist) uniform:

and this is a tame version of the uniform... it gets much smaller at times during the show

All that being said however, I do see some major points of empowerment in the show for women, but as to whether the show is feminist or misogynist is not something I'm going to get into as there are HUNDREDS of similar arguments online. 

also for fans of interpretive dance

Overall, I recommend it if you like lots of action, T&A, parodic humor, fast paced story lines and explosions. 



Other anime I've watched lately: 
-Witch Craft Works
-Free!
-Sakura Trick
-Toradora
-Danganronpa
-Gatchaman Crowds

All fun watches, but I don't have as much to say about them, yet.

As of late, I've also been reading a LOT of manga, and in a non-surprise, I really am starting to prefer manga to anime. Non-gasp.

Some favorites:
-A Silent Voice by Yoshitoki Oima

OMG A SILENT VOICE GOD WHY TEARS SO MANY TEARS ARGH SO FEELS PAIN STORY ARGHHHHH. And that's all I have to say about that.

-Inside Mari by Shuzo Oshimi

Man, this manga is so nerve wracking. The premise is that one day a man wakes up in the body of a woman with no context other than the fact that he used to watch her every night at 9 PM at a convenience store. It's just horrifying to see how he slips up in the world of the feminine, and how desperately he tries to resume his previous life. Definitely a fun but scary read. 

-Citrus by Saburo Uta 

Gyaru gal falls in love with her tight laced school president step-sister. Of course. 

-Is This Girl For Real?! by Tsutomu Mutsuki

Drunk thirty-something falls for teenage boy she ends up living with. Of course.

-Love Theory by Keiya Mizuno

This is hella misogynist but soooo entertaining. Basically a POA tries to improve the life of a love-impaired virgin with a ghostly twist. 

And others that I'm forgetting but were fun nonetheless. 

yeah dude i'm not gonna list like the 25 manga i've just read

I've also taken up Pilates, Boxing, and MMA Fitness. But since I suck at all of those currently, I'll talk more about that when I can actually post something meaningful about it. 

I'll try and post more as my life changes, but as it's going currently, this is pretty much it.

So, 


Ttyl. :)














Friday, October 11, 2013

How to get into tabletop gaming, and why!


Hey y'all.

So, first things first: I never thought I'd be writing this post. Like, ever. Literally, every time I mention tabletop gaming (alright, maybe not every time, but like, 97% of the time) I almost always get a negative reaction. 

If it's not:


Then it's: 


Or it's: 


AND ESPECIALLY:



Tabletop gaming has become (and I think always started as) a major joke thanks to the media; especially the granddaddy of all tabletop games, Dungeons and Dragons (unless you count Chainmail, but come on). Most people tend to picture a bunch of overweight, hygiene-impaired hermits wearing helmets fashioned out of aluminum foil roleplaying sexual fantasies with elven maidens--and sometimes, that's completely the case. Which, is totally fine.

BUT!

What people don't realize is that that is a very small percentage of those who love the tabletop rpg genre. A lot of players are women of all shapes and sizes, younger kids, beefy looking dudes (like Vin Diesel, a lifelong lover of DnD), people of all races and nationalities... The list could go on forever; which, brings me to my next point: tabletop gaming isn't just about the game--it's about the people you play with, too. Personally, I have had many tabletop gaming groups come and go in my life. Some were great (like the time I created this totally badass Mayan superheroine made out of plasma who kicked ass and took names) and some were not so great (like the time I spent almost an entire session facebooking on my phone because the DM was speaking in a monotone, and his story was very poorly planned). But, the thing that they all have in common is that I remember my interactions with the other players, and it was a great chance to get together with friends and really let your mind loose. Now, if you're a person who lacks in imagination, has a hard time thinking of creative solutions to otherworldly problems and generally dislikes adventure, tabletop rpgs will NOT be for you. But, if you are the kind of person that enjoys those things, maybe this might be a pastime that can be an excellent complement to an already intricate mind. 

SO! How do we do this? Well...

aw yea

If you're familiar with my 'how to get into and collect comics' post, you may already have a Friendly Local Comic Shop (or FLCS, for short). If said FLCS is also a gaming store (as are almost ALL FLCS's around here) then that's your first stop. If you have never visited a local comic shop, try typing in "gaming store" followed by your zip code into Google; you should have a list of the nearest gaming stores pop up almost immediately. If this is a good gaming store (I'll put up a post of what constitutes a good store next), there will almost always be a "Learn To Play X Game" night, or at the very least, a bulletin board with active games seeking players. If you can attend one of those event nights (if the store holds one) you should be golden! But, if you have to find a group to get started, there's a little more legwork involved. 

Firstly, take a look at what game the group is playing. Typically, a group seeking players ad will look like this:

PATHFINDER GROUP SEEKING NEW MEMBER
Every other Thurs, Fri, Sat; 6-10 PM
Experienced group, open to novice players
Contact Dave at (123) 456-7890 or email
sexydaveslaysalltheogres@superfastemail.com

Now, there are a couple of different approaches to this. Some people will look at the dates and times first without even contacting the DM because the dates and times don't work for them. Others will make that first contact and see if anything can be arranged, and whether the DM seems friendly or somewhat controlling (you'd be surprised how much you can gather just from discussing play times with certain DMs). Regardless of what you choose, lets assume you read the above notice and think "Yeah, this sounds like a great fit for me!", talk to the DM, and are meeting this Thursday for your very first session.

i know, me too.

You'll notice the... er... notice (lol) was concerning Pathfinder (a very fun spin on traditional Dungeons and Dragons, or DnD 3.75 ed. if you will). It would definitely be in your best interest to pick up a copy (or try and order one online, last resort is looking for a free PDF [support your gamemakers guys!!!]) of the rule book and get started in learning about the game and how to make your character. It's in pretty bad taste to show up to a group without so much as an attempt to make a character (especially since the book is pretty straightforward), so try your hardest to make Aegwynn the Wanderer a reality on paper even if some aspects confuse you. Within the book will be a nifty character sheet that will prompt you to fill in blanks pertaining to all of the aspects that you'll need to play your character well in a standard game; instructions on doing so are always within the first few pages. See? Really simple.



But, of course, I forgot to mention: DICE!! Almost every single tabletop roleplaying game utilizes dice in one way or another. This is an INTEGRAL part of your gaming experience... And arguably, one of the most entertaining. Dice come in all shapes, sizes, colors and patterns and your gaming store will definitely carry a few standard sets (if they don't, like seriously, dafuq is going on there) which consist of a d4 (as in, ONE die with FOUR sides), d6, d8, d10, d12, and a d20 (the most infamous of them all). It's also a good idea to maybe get a few more individual d6s since some games are heavy on d6 use. 


So, now that you've got your dice, your rule book, your character sheet printed and your character made (or as made as they're going to get), make sure you take paper and pencil to the game as well. Few things are as infuriating as players who a) brought nothing but dice and a character sheet so they have to scramble and borrow to be functional members, b) wrote everything on their character sheet in PEN so now the sheet is filled with scribbles and it takes them a thousand years to make out current stats or c) brought char sheet and pencil, but left scratch paper--so they borrow a sheet and write important information that almost always gets lost before the next session. 

So, to recap: find a local gaming store, find out if there are games looking for players or if there is a "get to know x game night", make contact with said events or group, get to know the game (or a game, if you want to jump into something specific), buy your dice, make a character and show up prepared to the event/group with paper and pencil. 

i'm trying, god

It seems like it's a lot of work, but it's really not; once you have that totally amazing character you love, it's totally worth it. Let me know if this post helps, and if you end up finding a group or a store that gets you into tabletop rpgs, I'd love to hear from you!










Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Sorry I've been gone so long, been doing things... And stuff...

Damn. Where the hell have I been?

It's literally been TWO MONTHS SINCE I LAST POSTED ANYTHING.

yeah, i know.

Well to be completely honest with you... I haven't been doing anything at all. I'm still stuck in finance limbo in regards to the gaming store. I know, I know--still? Well yes people, still. Literally it's been hurdle after hurdle in this friggin' rat race, and it's at this point that a lot of people quit. I totally don't blame them; I'm feeling mighty disillusioned and downtrodden myself. However, quitting is not an option for me in this endeavor since it's literally do this and accomplish my dreams or get back on the med school route... And no, I do not want to do that. 

exactly.

So, what has been occupying my time these past 60 days? Well, for starters, I was gifted a Crunchyroll subscription by my darling pseudo-husband (which I wonder whether it was a gift for me, for him, or to get me out of his hair?). Literally, I have been glued to that service like lice on a curly haired child with questionable hygiene. I've watched Shingeki no Kyojin (Attack on Titan), Puella Magi Madoka Magica, Free!, Toradora (which I absolutely love/hate beyond all reasoning), The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, Sword Art Online, and just started Naruto--and am only five weeks in. 

just a tad. lol jk, i ain't about to start calling people -chan and -kun

Aside from that I also started Supernatural on Netflix, finished Orange is the New Black (LOVE LOVE LOVE this show!!), watched a ton of Doctor Who, started Breaking Bad (again), am catching up on The Walking Dead, started Portlandia and am revisiting Scrubs. I am living life well.

no.

But, of course, I am not leaving out the games! I have also started Final Fantasy XIII (loveeee), Dragon Age (again), been getting through Mass Effect 3 (it's finally time to end this... I love you Shepard), bought Psychonauts on the PSN (aw yeaaaa, nostalgiaaaaa) and started Pokemon Pearl (again). I've been giving the PS3 a LOT more love than I usually do... In fact, it's really grown on me to the point where I, a once diehard Xbro, am now equally taken (if not a tad more so) with the PS3. There, I said it. 




I've also been diving into my own spirituality and have been leaning towards Buddhism as a complement (and then perhaps replacement??) to my current Pagan path, but I'll only elaborate on that if you want me to. 

there's some really, really mindbending/awesome stuff there... if you're interested.

So with all of that said, maybe I'll go ahead and do a post on what I'm digging game-wise; I know I still owe some of you a "how to get into tabletop gaming" post, and I haven't forgotten! I'll write that up next. But, for now, I shall be going. I have to go sort a mess where my Twitter app has just unfollowed literally everyone I follow. Joy.









Thursday, August 8, 2013

Quite easily the most difficult post I've ever written: how to talk to (and get to know) women of the geeky variety...

Why,

thanks to River Song this is now my de facto greeting

Okay, so, this is probably the third incarnation of this post that I've written before reaching the middle point and scrapping everything altogether. I know that a lot of you may be wondering just why it is that this is so difficult considering that I am indeed, a woman. Well, the issue here is that I am a very particular woman, and what may fly for other women most definitely does NOT fly with me and vice versa. Honestly, I can always tell if I'm going to like a person within the first few minutes of meeting them just by the things they tell me and the way they act around me. So, imagine me trying to generalize the way I am and pretend that all women are just like me?

 right, cause i'm SO special.

I figured the best thing for me to do here is to explain what I prefer in people when being approached--and that's just it, I hate being approached romantically. 

For me, there is nothing worse than when a person decides that they are going to completely ignore the option of getting to know me as a genuine friend and seeing if I'm even remotely what they're looking for in a partner. And when I say genuine, I don't mean the whole "let's be friends until I can find enough of an avenue to hit on you or ease you into a relationship", I mean legit, non-sexualized friendship. Apparently this is a rare enough thing, because out of ten men (I've yet to have this problem with a woman--just stating the truth here) I meet on Twitter, seven of them end up hitting on me after asking the same old questions: 

So what games are you into?
What's your favorite game?
What's your favorite comic and why?
What are your favorite movies? What music do you listen to?
How are you? (typically, this wouldn't be so bad if the person weren't really using it as a segue into how THEY are doing, regardless of how I answer)

Usually, once I answer these questions, the person will try and one up me with their own experience/favorite game/etc. to... idfk, make me so impressed with them I send nudes?? OR they'll say something like "Wow! We have so much in common. I really like talking to you, so do you mind if I got your number?"

YES. YES I DO MIND.

Do you know WHY I mind so much (besides the fact I'm pseudo-married of course)? Because once you take it to that level, you've effectively displayed that you could care less what my answers to your questions were because you were simply giving me your attention in the hopes that I would reciprocate your advances with my number, like some sort of a reward. It's literally like a bad Dating 101 class (ask her what she likes--girls LOVE talking about themselves! Just keep asking questions, seem interested!) acted out in real life. For me, going through the motions is getting really old; yet, I keep answering and I keep acting like I don't know exactly where things are going simply because I don't want to be rude and I don't want to come off like an arrogant person. But, in reality, don't you think it's a little obvious that you have more than friendship in mind when you send a private Tweet versus a public one (not that ALL people who send DMs are looking for e-poon, but you catch my drift)?

47 DMs?! WHY THE HOLY FUCK?

The best way to get on my good side (and perhaps on the good side of other geeky women out there) is to not go into social interactions with me with the intent of getting my number, getting a relationship started, or anything of the sort. Literally, imagine talking to me as you would a bro. Would you honestly go into a friendship with another man and ask him ten million questions with the end goal of somehow scoring a phone number? Well, I guess maybe someone out there might, but I think I'm safe in suggesting that most people won't. 

Guys, let a woman become fond of your personality. Have interests, hobbies, contribute to a conversation without coming off condescending or trying to somehow compete with the woman you're talking to if she's into the same things you are. Yes, I know, if you were talking to another man you may just try and compete, but in this aspect, I ask that you test the waters first. See if she is competitive, then act accordingly. A little common sense goes a LONG way in this area, which leads me to another thing: if you actively go searching for a love-interest, you will almost never find one. In my experience, these things happen randomly, with the people you least expect. So, just relax. Don't worry about scoring a date with that girl. Become her friend first; forget she's a girl in the first place. Talk about your interests, yes, but also talk about things that are going on in the world around you. Share opinions. Debate. But, most importantly, laugh together. If you can't naturally laugh with a girl, then chances are a relationship won't work in the slightest. Take it from me, I've been there. 

Also, one last thing: please, for the love of god, do NOT try and hit on a woman because you HAVE to. What do I mean by this? Well, let's say you see a woman who's into comics, games, action movies and (for random specificity's sake) Godzilla, and feel that those traits are HIGHLY desirable--so desirable, in fact, that you couldn't live with yourself if you didn't at least try to get her number. After all, you don't want her to be 'the one that got away' do you?

oh god.

Listen. How many men out there do you think had the same thought process before you? How many men do you think felt that they just HAD TO TRY and make a move just to see if it would result in anything? If the girl is anything like me (mind you, not that I'm that special or anything, but I do bitch and moan about things that some guys find interesting) the number is quite high. So when yet ANOTHER guy comes along and tries to hit on me with whatever tactic he feels works best (note the use of the word tactic--if you're using strategy to get a girlfriend, something is wrong) it comes off as dull and more of the same thing I've been exposed to. I repeat: love--true, happy, compatible and functional love--comes randomly and when you least expect it. Trying too hard to find it is killing you, Smalls. 

So with all of that said, hopefully you more or less understand that women are NOT Bioware games that will respond favorably depending on your conversational choice. 

OH! AND MAJOR NOTE:
Stay away--FAR, FAR AWAY--from seduction techniques; i.e. r/seduction and all that CRAP. It's nonsensical, misogynist bullshit that objectifies and degrades women. I, personally, know exactly when that shit is being used, and it's an automatic blacklist. Don't do it. 

go young grasshopper, you are ready.











Monday, August 5, 2013

So life moves on, with or without you. Go figure.

Hello ladies and gents. 

Today's post is both a terrible, tragic one and an amazing, super happy one. I literally had no idea that I could feel soul shattering sadness and unbelievable ecstatic joy at the very same time just 24 hours ago, so bear with me. 

Firstly, there has been a death in my family.

At around 3:30 am yesterday, my unofficial brother-in-law (he would have become my official brother-in-law soon enough; he was already mentioning marriage and kids) suffered an aneurysm and collapsed at his friend's house after having watched a movie with a friend and his girlfriend (my sister; they had been dating over a year). He hadn't been feeling well and suffered from headaches for quite some time, but always shrugged them off and refused to see a doctor because he "hated getting check-ups". On the night of his rupture, he had been suffering from a particularly terrible headache when he suddenly felt what we believe is the actual pain of the rupture and told my sister to call an ambulance. Only a few hours later he fell into a coma, and less than eight hours after that was declared brain dead. He was 22. 

My sister is doing amazingly well; she's calm, keeping her emotions together, and being strong for his family. I have no idea how she's doing this, considering I can hear it in her voice that she's one memory away from shattering--if I were in her position, I would be inconsolable. Yet, here she is, soldiering on, thinking about all the work than needs to be done before she begins her senior year in high school, wiping away her tears silently. She hasn't left his side since he collapsed--through everything, she has been at the hospital and has slept there the past two nights. She's there now, even though he's already dead, because she won't leave until they finally remove the respirator. 

Never in my life have I ever felt grief for someone else hit so close to home. I've wept at national tragedies, wept at the injustices in the world, wept at the abuse that children suffer daily--but this has been something that I just can't even stand to think about. To think that my sister, someone who enjoyed her partner's company so very much, someone who called him her best friend has to deal with the fact that he's dead in such an unceremonious manner breaks my heart. Especially because the situation she's in is my very worst fear. My husband is my best friend, my soulmate. I couldn't bear to live without him. 

And yet, she's suffering it, she's living this horror. God, I just can't. 

~

But, it's a maddening enough thing that while the world is literally standing on my sister's shoulders right now, life keeps on moving. Today I had a meeting with the real estate agent that would be leasing us the spot for The Paladin's Blade and I couldn't believe I was finally at the point where I could stand inside the space that will be my life's work for the next several years of my life. 


I kept staring around at the awful concrete floor and shitty, water stained ceiling tiles; blank, grey walls stared back at me and I felt stifled by the dark, dank atmosphere of an unfinished space--yet, all I could see was our completed store, ready for sales, painted and filled with merchandise, waiting for people to see her in her full glory. I can't contain how excited I am to be putting so much hard work into a tangible, visible reality right now. There is so much ahead of us and yet, I don't feel overwhelmed or burdened; I feel ready.

oh hell yes.

To add to the news, we also received word from our lender that all of the paperwork has been processed and we can officially open our account. Judging by this, I would say that The Paladin's Blade will be open by late September/early October if all goes to plan. The biggest hassle will be setting up our account with the comic book distributors, which take two fucking months to process our order. We're also having a hell of a time with another wholesaler that (due to customer loyalty) doesn't want to let us open our account with them since we are within 20 miles of a competitor that offers their products. FML. Painting, stocking, shelving and all that jazz should take a month at best, and we'll be devoting a week to our special floor endeavor (which will be revealed later... it's going to be badass, I assure you); between all of these little pieces, we'll definitely need a little over 60 days to accomplish everything. 


:)

~
(In memory of Orlando Figueredo, 1990-2013)
~



Monday, July 22, 2013

A quick update and some news...

Holy crap, I'm stressed. 

i'm totally crying na, i'm fine

You all may have noticed I haven't posted a blog article in a while; I thoroughly apologize. Things have been getting SERIOUS, as in, scoping out locations for the store serious. I've fallen in love with store lots only to have my heart shattered (I'm looking at you, beautiful, spacious Pembroke Pines lot next to Whole Foods) when I find out that they weren't available in the first place, and I've been disillusioned with beautiful spaces after looking at the areas they're housed in. Prices are astronomical; I expected this, yes, but what I didn't expect was the crazy shit some plaza owners have been trying to pull. One owner asked for an entire year's rent upfront before he'd rent me anything. WELL GEE, MR. OVERZEALOUS SHOPPING CENTER NAZI, WHY PAY YOU RENT AT ALL?! 

I just have one thing to say to that: 


For those of you not in the know, I am in the middle of opening a tabletop gaming/comic book store. In all other aspects (except financing, which I'm tackling as well) things are coming along swimmingly; good luck has been abundant. I've been able to find almost everything I'm looking for, and even found a beautiful, brand new, remodeled place today--in the heart of Crapville.

it does not resemble this at all

The interior has been newly painted, the ceiling fixtures also painted and fixed, floors brand new and laminated--and for the area, relatively cheap. But the shopping center? Oy vey. Peeling paint, water stains, cracked cement, no-name stores, a rinky-dink car wash tent and an old gas station. Ugh. According to my Twitter followers, they'd still go regardless of the location if the store is good enough; let's hope that I can make that statement true with the various odds and ends I plan on implementing.

In regards to the infamous "How to talk to geek girls" post, it's halfway complete. I'm having a really, really tough time writing it up--I just feel like I'm overgeneralizing women and honestly, how could I possibly pretend to know/feel what every geeky woman in the world does? I could maybe do a post on what I would like in a man (or how I would best respond to come-ons) if people requested that instead. 

Now excuse me while I go hyperventilate and have several small children in the corner. 



Monday, July 15, 2013

Frequently Asked Questions, Volume One

Hey you gurl, yeah you

Today is FAQ day, and I've got your questions answered. Chyea. 

Except the stupid sexual ones (you know who you are). Like, seriously, why do men hit on girls on the internet? What, am I gonna mail you my vagina? And even if I were to pay attention to you, do you think you'd get anywhere by being downright crude? Hmph. 

i know. that's what i said.

But anyway, considering the positive feedback on Twitter, I've decided that I will be doing the post on how to talk to women (particularly of the geeky variety) that has been requested. A fair warning though--if you're looking for a guide on how to trick geeky women into sex (as so eloquently phrased by a follower--props, bro), you will be sorely disappointed. That shit DON'T fly at House Paragon. 

If you thought it did:


SO, questions! 

1. What kinds of games do you play?

I have several different genres that I enjoy: Action RPG (Shooter/Sandbox RPGs particularly), RTS (tower defense, wargames too, even though I suck at them), MMORPG, Action/Adventure (particularly stealth), Adventure, Simulations, FPS (occasionally), Rhythm, Puzzle, Educational, and Casual (like mobile games?) if I'm really bored. 

2. What's your favorite game?

The Mass Effect trilogy, hands down. I also deeply care for the Metal Gear series, The Burning Crusade expansion for WoW, Psychonauts, Halo (3 & 4 particularly), Dead Rising, and Grand Theft Auto: Vice City. An honorable mention is Bayonetta

3. How long have you been reading/collecting comics?

As far as reading goes, I've been reading comics since I was 12 years old, so effectively, ten years. As far as collecting them, I started recently, around four years ago. 

4. What are your favorite comics?

To be completely honest, I've been won over by Saga by Brian K. Vaughan. Under that one are some tried and true favorites: Wonder Woman, Superman, Uncanny X-Men; and I have a real soft spot for Scott Pilgrim graphics.

5. Favorite comic book character?

Rogue. She's a perfectly complex character, with the wills and wants of any woman her age yet she is barred from the physical world of human contact. Excellent. Also, Rogue is freaking broken, especially after Sage let her recall all of her powers in the X-Treme X-Men story arc. Hello, ownage.

6. What kind of music do you like? 

EDM, 80's nuwave, industrial, darksynth, goth rock, darkwave, and the occasional odd song that catches my fancy (or as another follower put it, stuff with extension cords. Fair enough)

7. Favorite band?

A Perfect Circle. (I know, not any of the genres up there. Go figure)

8. So you're writing a book? What's it about?

Yes, I am--it's my life's project. It concerns a man named Orion who dreams of the pain of humanity on a nightly basis, suffering greatly until his dreams introduce a beautiful, ethereal-looking indigo haired woman. She thankfully offers him respite from the tempestuous horror he usually endures--until one day he finds an abandoned indigo haired baby in an old library, left for him to care for. 

9. How tall are you/how much do you weigh?

Why, are you holding a modeling competition? Better question for you, do you ask the dudebros this too?

10. Can I have your number so we can get to know each other better?

Okay guys, listen. 'Get to know each other better' is fooling no one. I know that means 'Can I flirt with you and slowly progress into inappropriate waters in a non-public environment where I cannot be held accountable for my actions or possibly have my rejection displayed for all to see and/or mock?', and all my friends know this too. Dude, I am on the internet, not your neighbor. I could be a burly dude with a massive cock. Doesn't that scare you?!

TL;DR: No. Stop asking.

11. Do you have Skype/Snapchat/Kik/insert whatever the kids are using to see/touch each other: 

No.

12. Facebook? 

No.

13. Do you have Instagram? Tumblr? A blog? Anything?!

You haven't even bothered to read my Twitter bio, have you? If you're new to the blog and haven't been on my Twitter, then why, yes! I do have all those things! Click here, where my link information is on display for all to enjoy.

14. You're a small business owner? What's your business entail?

I'm the owner of The Paladin's Blade, an upcoming tabletop gaming/comic book store in Miami, FL. The store specializes in tabletop games like Dungeons and Dragons, Warhammer, Magic the Gathering, and more. It's totally great.

you done?

In all honesty though, I sincerely emphasize that I love getting (most of) your questions, and you should never worry about asking them, ever. No, I'm never bothered, and no, it's never creepy. I promise. My followers get to ask me anything so long as it's something they'd ask a dudebro. So yeah, 'What's your bra size?' is not appropriate. If you ask a complete stranger that on the internet, you're gross.

looking away now.